Mustache Sunglasses

Stacheforge wants to make its readers aware of these sweet sunglasses featuring a built-in fake mustache.

A fake mustache is NEVER a substitute for a real one, but for people who can't grow a proper mouthhat, these glasses will allow you to show proper respect for the mustachioed.

American Mustache Institute Interview With Aaron Rogers

Stacheforge reader Ben Palmer sent us a link to a CBS Sports article discussing the on-again-off-again presence of lipfur on Superbowl-winning quarterback Aaron Rogers. The American Mustache Institute did an interview with Rogers, where he acknowledges the realization of his lifelong goal to be a mustachioed American:

David Tatro, Madison, WI

Nice stache, David! Wow, check out that heavyweight-championship-contender mouthdrape! These two pictures were taken at different times, though incredibly in the same location, facing the same wall. This allows us fervent Stacheforge readers to appreciate the subtle evolution of a mustache over its lifetime. The quiet robustness of the earlier stache matures into the longer and less cohesive version of the later stache. Best of all, each of these photographs feature a picture of alopecia-style, evil bizarro David in the photograph over his shoulder, locked away safely like General Zod trapped in the Phantom Zone.

Goodness gracious, that mouth-mane looks like it is ready to step off of his face and street-fight a pair of hoodlums. In the second picture, it looks like he just ate a donut dusted with the white ashes of his mortal enemies, who vaporized under the intensity of that manly lipcover. Perhaps David had a nasty accident involving peroxide, or else got in an accident like that kid from that song from the 90s.

Stacheforge is very sad to inform its readers, however, that this telling of the life story of a worthy lip-hood is also a eulogy, because David reports that he shaved off that bad boy after taking the second photograph. As we've said before, Stacheforge supports the right of all mustaches to live proudly upon their caretaker's lips, and we cannot condone the destruction of any mustache whatsoever. Nevertheless, this was a good mustache which lived a good life, even if it was -- ahem -- cut short.