Chris Rinard, Anchorage, Alaska

Nice Stache, Chris! Up there in Alaska, there's the breed of man who doesn't need a full beard to fight off the cold, blustry winter storms. For this kind of man, one only needs a sweet strip of liphair which dangles menacingly over each mouth-corner like one of those spaceships from Tron. Stacheforge readers might ask themselves why Chris would need sunglasses in a land with so little sunlight that they write songs about it, and the answer is that Chris needs to shade his eyes from the perpetual glow of that incredible facial adornment.

Stacheforge advises Chris to keep allowing the 'stache to have lots of sunlight, which will help it grow.

Girls Have Mustaches, Too

"I’d always figured that by finding a girl with her original mustache that I’d be finding some re-creation of the original woman, like meeting Eve, although probably a lot more enriching than that. Especially since, according to the fossil record, when Eve wasn’t basking in the magnificence of God’s Creation she was probably eating bugs out of old logs with a stick. Even so, finding a girl with a mustache would be finding a girl more likely to make the sort of bad decisions that favored the ruddier and more salacious pleasures of life, like nose-picking and peeing at the side of the road."

Ladies, if you have a sweet 'stache, send us a picture at submit@stacheforge.com.

Markus Matei and Todd Steinhauer, Napa Valley, CA

Nice stache, Markus! Nice stache, Todd! These two suave gentlemen show how different styles of mustaches compliment different styles of fashion.

Markus, on the left, is a German working as a production assistant on the set of a reality television show out there in Napa Valley, where this picture was taken. His mustache goes well with his pressed shirt and fancy pocket pen.

Todd, on the right, is an audio engineer for the same reality television show. His trucker-style mustache matches that special vest, which is reportedly specially built to hold the various audio equipment used in that line of work.

Note how the mustaches even seem to match the looks on the mens' faces. Also note that both men have sunglasses, which perhaps they offer to bystanders who need to shield their eyes from such brilliant and stunning fuzzy facial features. Great mustaches, guys!

On a final note, Stacheforge acknowledges the woman in the background who is photobombing the picture. Her name is Shannon, and she is the production coordinator on the set. We discourage her from her desperate attempts to appear here on Stacheforge until she grows a mustache of her own, although we share her enthusiasm for these two awesome hairy lips.

Frank Yoshida, Seattle, WA

Nice stache, Frank! That thing right there is one fashionable facial feature. According to Mr. Yoshida, this lip coif lived a short life of only one day, as an intermediate step between an unshaven face and a cleanshaven face. That is a pity, because that is a beauty!

Look how carefully Frank trimmed the whiskers to be so even in length and balanced at each corner of his mouth. Clearly Frank has both hirsuteness of face and the dexterity of scissor, so we hope that someday he will reprise this mouth hat. Stacheforge cannot promote the destruction of mustaches, because we believe that every one has a right to live long upon its lip, free from the fear of razor blades and beards. Nevertheless, the life of some mustaches, like this one, are short but beautiful.

As always send pictures of real men with real mustaches to submit@stacheforge.com.

Brett Baddorf, Madison, WI

Nice stache, Brett! That incredible mustache is a true facial feature. It looks like a whiskery inner-tube is wrapped around Brett's face. It looks like the noseband of a horse bridle. It's the kind of mustache that would sneak out at night, attack and kill other mustaches, then eat them to gain their power. Note the jealousy evident in the face of the clean-shaven unnamed gentleman in this picture.

Eric Phillippi & Jimmy Bero, Madison, WI

Nice stache, Eric! Nice stache, Jimmy! Wow, these men are taking facial hair to a new level.

That's Eric on the left; Jimmy on the right. This dynamic duo developed these hirsute visages for Mustache March at Blackhawk Church, which might or might not be the same as this Mustache March. Jimmy explains it this way:

Every Sunday, our church youth group gets together, and we decided to celebrate Mustache March by having all our high school students and leaders come with mustaches. The staches ranged from stick-ons bought on Amazon to ribbon taped below the nose. Someone actually glued their own hair cut from their head onto their face. Simply an epic night.

Stacheforge is excited to recognize Mustache March as a legitimate complement to Movember. Stacheforge is also excited to mention Mustache May, but Stacheforge is much less excited about the pretender mustache-themed months, with websites found only on Facebook: Mustache February, Mustache July, Mustache September, Mustache October, and Mustache December. It is true, however, that any month is good for showing off a homegrow soup strainer.

Eric's chinhair is dangerously close to being a beard, but Stacheforge is willing to round it down to "tickler" status because of the truly epic nature of that manly facial stripe! The mustache itself, too, dances with the boundaries of what it means to be be a mustache, but definitely qualifies, because it is disconnected from both sideburns. Jimmy doesn't play fast and loose with the rules the way Eric does: his mustache is a traditional throwback style, distinct on an otherwise closely shorn face.

Lynn Hauldren, RIP

It is with enormous sadness that Stacheforge acknowledges the passing of Lynn Hauldren, spokesman for the Empire flooring company. Although Lynn is most widely known as "The Empire Man", Stacheforge readers will remember him for having an awesome mustache. Rest in peace, Mr. Hauldren.